The Ugly Volvo

Author: Raquel D’Apice

  • And the Winner (of this contest going on in my apartment right now) is…

    *          *          * *          *          * *          *          * *          *          * *          *          *…

  • An Overview of the Oscar-Nominated Movies For Anyone Who Didn’t Get Around to Seeing Them (No Spoilers)

    The Oscars are almost upon us, which means it’s that time of year when I remember all the movies I meant to get around to seeing in the theaters, but which I only managed, months later, to slide into my Netflix queue.  (High hopes that I’ll get around to seeing them once I watch that…

  • Parenting Olympics

    For those of you angry that having a child prevented you from qualifying for the Rio 2016 Olympics, remember that while you may be losing at international sports competitions, you’re still in the running for a few other medals: Event 1: To level the playing field, this event is divided into multiple weightclasses: Newborn Infant…

  • How to Marry Your Baby

    I’m officiating a friend’s wedding ceremony this weekend, and it’s really hard to go from writing a wedding ceremony to writing a baby blog because, in case you haven’t read the latest neuroscience-based academic journals, it utilizes two separate parts of your brain. Fig. 1 (Below)   So instead of writing a post on an…

  • What I Do All Day When I Am Home With The Baby

    I am, for now, a stay at home mother. People sometimes ask what exactly I do during the day and I never have any idea what to say. Below is a fairly accurate description of most of the things I do on any given day. To save time, repetitive actions like changing diapers and feeding…

  • 10 Reasons Why Tiger Moms are TOTALLY AWESOME

    There’s been a lot of talk about Tiger Moms in the news lately, and by “The News” I of course mean, “My Twitter feed and this one woman at Gymboree who didn’t know me but had very strong opinions.”  Everyone seems to hate tiger moms, but I think they’re great!  Here’s why: *    …

  • An Exciting Night Out Without The Baby

    Jonathan enters the restaurant grinning and sits down across from me. Jonathan:  Ready for our hot date? Me:  I know– look at us going out to dinner like regular adults who don’t have a baby! Jonathan:  I know!  (Smiles) We shuffle our silverware for a few seconds and sip from our water glasses.  I pick…

  • A Breakdown of your Child’s Eating Patterns

    (Click graphs to enlarge.) *               *               * SEVEN STARS FARM ORGANIC PLAIN WHOLE MILK YOGURT *               *               * ORGANIC ROASTED BEETS *               *               * TRADER JOE’S BRAND CHEERIOS *               *               * PEAS FROM LOCAL FARMER’S MARKET (ALSO ORGANIC) *               *               * WHATEVER YOU WERE EATING *               *               * COOKIE/CUPCAKE/CHOCOLATE/ANYTHING CONTAINING REFINED SUGAR *          *          *…

  • BINGO

    It’s January 1st as I begin typing this, and already I’ve made an avalanche of resolutions that I will never in a million years be able to keep.  I’ve promised myself I’d read between 9 and 12 books, one of which is an 800-page biography of Theodore Roosevelt called “Wilderness Warrior,” which, for the record,…

  • Fun, Foolproof Tips for Getting the Perfect Photo with Santa

    I like when photos turn out well.  I don’t want to pretend I’m the most laid back person on earth and can always immediately say, “Oh, it’s totally fine!  I didn’t even care about getting a good photo!  Kids will be kids!”  I am decent at constructively dealing with disappointment, but that does not mean…